Can Google Even Do This?

 

In response to the recent outcry, primarily from the blogging community, Google announced it has reworked the current PageRank policy toward paid linking.

 

As many people are already aware, the previous response to web sites that accept payment for linking has been to remove all PageRank from these sites, thereby removing all value from their links.

 

Google Executive VP of Blogger Relations, Allistair Paid, admitted this tactic may have been an over reaction.

 

"The initial response was probably a little heavy handed, a bit like swatting flies with a sledgehammer."

 

Paid said that, in coordination with Junior VP of International Ad Sales, Shaniqua Poorly, a new system has been developed. This new rank designation system will run in tandem with the current PageRank system.

 

Initially called the PaidPoorlyRankingSystem, the title eventually became, simply, PaidRank. This title was determined to cause the least disruption and could be easily integrated into the current system.

 

How is PaidRank different?

 

Link Strength

 

The old algorithm of measuring incoming links and content quality will still be used to determine a site's rank, however, the new algorithm will not assign as much value to the site's outgoing links.

 

Bar Colors

 

The new PaidRank designation will be noted by a subtle, yet easily recognizable, difference in the toolbar field. Where PageRank is displayed with a Green Bar, PaidRank will be displayed with a Red Bar as seen below.

 

 

 

Improvement with AdWords and AdSense

 

One of the most unusual differences will be the ability of publishers to improve their site's PaidRank through participation in the AdWords and AdSense programs.

 

By bidding on Keyword Advertising through AdWords, the site will receive a double benefit. Not only will participation in this system allow the ad links to contribute to the organic PaidRank, but the PaidRank will also be improved in proportion to the AdWords bids.

 

In an effort to help the small publisher who has limited funding, another option was also developed. The site owner may choose to run AdSense ad blocks and accept a reduced payout, thereby improving their PaidRank proportionately as well.

 

By fully utilizing both of these options, a publisher can improve the PaidRate of a site to the point that it passes along as much downstream link strength as a site under the PageRank system.

 

Opting In

 

Inclusion in the new PaidRank program is strictly voluntary and requires the publisher to specifically request inclusion by email.

 

Simply send an email to paidrank.optin@gmail.com requesting the opt in forms. The forms will arrive in PDF format so you can easily print them for your records and then email them back to the proper address depending on which program(s) you choose to participate in.

 

Summary

 

Chief  Executive of Media Relations, Mujibar Kandlewhozit, had this to say about Paid and Poorly's new program;

 

"The Google team hopes this compromise will be seen as a fair and equitable middle ground between the owners of the internet and the masses trying to gather a few crumbs from the passing traffic."

 

That pretty much says it all!

 

 

*On Edit*

 

It has been brought to my attention that some or all of this information may not be completely accurate. My advise, as always, is to do as I do and research it yourself and stop believing everything you read on the internet.

 

 

If you enjoyed your read, grab my feed!

 

* Thank you to all of you Stumblers and Sphinners!

This article went HOT at 9:51 am!

17 comments:

Marty said...

Here's the Sphinn submission of this phun post.

Marty said...

http://sphinn.com/story/15990

Ad Tracker said...

Marty - Glad you liked it!

Thanks for the Sphinn :)

pearl said...

LOL!!

"swatting flies with a sledgehammer" LOL
by paidpoorly ?

Where the heck you came up with "Kandlewhozit" :D

definitely a hilarious and enjoyable read! :)

Ad Tracker said...

Pearl - Glad you enjoyed it!

I was just trying to come up with some appropriate sounding names ;)

mcangeli said...

Is there a link to anything on the google regarding this? I googled it and your post is the only thing that comes up...

pittfall said...

Thanks for this (well thought out) sarcastic prose! It looks like you even got at least one bite too.

Simonne said...

This is interesting. I wonder if the flies are going to get their wings back, if Google is so sorry for the sledge hammer attack.

Igor The Troll said...

EvilGoogle apologize?

Only when Hell freezez over..:)

Ryan said...

Haha, Google helping people? That's like Walmart giving people free money!

Jeanne Dininni said...

Too much! You just love to get us going, don't you! But "Kandlewhozit"? That was the clincher!

Great satire!
Jeanne

Mark said...

Okay, you had me going there for a moment. ;)

BlogStruk said...

Brilliant. I love it! Just stumbled and sphunn it. Hope it does as well as your other Google post!

Chanya

Judd Pickett said...

Superb! Ooh, ooh, I want a PaidRank meter on my blog now :)

Ad Tracker said...

WOW!!! Sorry I took so long to get these wonderful comments responded to. Oh well, here goes!

@ Mangeli - Ummm, sorry for the confusion, it's labled satire dude ;) Thanks for stopping in though!

@ Pittfall - Thanks. hehe It never fails. I always get one or two. Last time it ended up on Digital Point LOL!

@ Simonne - LOL! I don't think Google ever gives anything back without a price.


@ Igor - You got that right ;)

@ Ryan - Good one!

@ Jeanne - I do enjoy it ;) Thanks.

@ Mark - I don't believe that, but thanks ;)

@ Chanya - Thank you very much! It already has :)

@ Judd - LOL! Thanks. You know, for a small fee...


Thank you everyone for your comments, stumbles and Sphinns!

Bobby said...

Sorry I'm late...let me help you get this groundbreaking news out!!!

How dare they do that, I can't even afford gas:)

Ad Tracker said...

Bobby - Hi! Nice to see you!

Hey, at least they got the red and green thing going on for Christmas ;)